Bunny Farm writings
by Dawn Racer
Summary: Okay so I was on Livejournal .com and found the TFbunnyfarm. Needless to say I was entertained by quite a few of the ideas. I can only hope I do them justice.
1. Sticky Notes

**Promt: Prowl absolutely _adores _sticky notes. Frankly, Jazz is freaking out. From the Bunny Farm.**

**Rating: PG**

**Paring: none. PXJ if you squint hard enough.**

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Every bot had something fun that they like to do, some hobby. Humans had them, they collected bottle caps, did art, cooked, and more. Some bots had taken up similar hobbies to pass the time, even Prowl. _Although_, Jazz recollected nervously, _Prowl should really quit his...Ah don't think it's healthy..._

Jazz was peaking into the office, watching Prowl decorate the wall in sticky notes of all things. A grin on his lips, a creepy one jazz might add, Prowl's wings flared as he jotted something on the sticky note. The whole room, what was once the orange walls of the ark's SIC office, was highlighter yellow.

Slanted elegant symbols were on _every single note_ placed _all over_ the walls. Jazz's left optic ridge twitched under his visor. How...just how...

"Ya know...when ah said ge' a hobby ah meant something like...drawin'...not..._this_." Prowl twisted to stare at him, his optics burning with a glint that quite frankly scared him.

"You do not like my sticky notes?" He said gesturing all around with one servo, the other one twitching rather...oddly. Jazz was inclined to say no, but he wondered what would happen to him if he did.

"There uh...nice Prowler..." Inching out the door he quickly left the SIC to his...hobby.

Not a week later all datapads around base, all equipment, every bot even had sticky notes attached to them. The whole base was in an uproar about who put the sticky notes everywhere. It was moments like this that Jazz really wondered about his, and Prowl's sanity. Running into Prowl's office he paused to see it was a flurry of yellow...literally. It looked like it was raining sticky notes.

He looked at one that landed on his pede and picked it up, the symbols flatly stated, "My Precious", Jazz's optic twitched as he turned and walked away, a few of the notes sticking to his pedes and legs. Enough was enough.

"Prowler?!"

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**AN:**

I didn't know if anyone did this promt yet, but I couldn't resist. I don't think I did it justice, but it was just too hilarious for me to ignore. ^_^

**~D.R. Out**


	2. Worst Case Scenario I

Pairing: PxJ, (later pairings: SxRxS, OPxI, HxM, ect)

Rating: T

Anger, it was a prominent thing through every culture, time, place and species. Anger was something Prowl knew all to well, he was intimate with its embrace. He huffed a sigh and sat there in his office, the door locked.

He knew he should be doing his work, but he couldn't concentrate. The cons had been rather quiet and that is where his problems had lain.

_"Prowler?" The autobot's SIC looked up from his work to study his bondmate, setting the datapad down he refrained from scowling or sighing. He had a good idea—probability was 99 percent actually—of what this conversation was going to be about._

_ "Yes Jazz?" The said mech paced into the room; the swagger in his step showed confidence, but the emotion through the bond contradicted that. His fellow black and white sat down on his desk and turned to face him minutely, visor glowing as he nervously played with his claws. _

_ "Ah was thinkin...with tha cons bein' so quiet...coul' we try fo' a sparkling?" The immediate harness of Prowls icy optics was answer enough. _

_ "No Jazz. You know the risks! How could we-"_

_ "What risks!? The cons are quiet Prowler! You always say later, when Prowler? When!? Lately ya won't touch mah, won't kiss mah, nothin'!" _

_ The saboteur slid from the desk, visor glowing brilliantly, and left as the tactician sighed. Prowl pinched his olfactory sensor plating and shuttered his optics. The pain coursing from Jazz was enough to sway Prowl a little, but then the saboteur blocked the bond. Groaning Prowl thumped his helm against the desk. 'why me?' _

He wasn't angry at Jazz, he could never be, he was angry at himself. By now Jazz had locked himself in their quarters and wouldn't let him in. Growling lowly Prowl stood up and walked out of the room only to almost walk into Optimus Prime.

"Optimus sir, I apologize." His superior nodded to him, face mask hiding the smile he sent his SIC.

"Prowl, I was looking for you. Would you mind collecting Jazz and meeting me in the main room?" Prowl saluted him and quickly confirmed that he would. With a nod toward the SIC, Optimus strode down the hall. Sighing Prowl quickly walked toward his and Jazz's quarters.

Knocking on the door he waited patiently for Jazz to open it. As soon as the door opened it closed again. Prowl was unable to resist rolling his optics at the childish display.

"Jazz, you can not stay on there. Optimus has required our prescence." A low growl emitted from the other side of the door, a moment later the cranky sabotuer pushed past him and down the hall.

"Other way Jazz, main room in." With a huff Jazz walked past an amused Prowl. Said doorwinger shook his helm and followed after him, a few moments later he and Jazz were standing beside Prime as the other officers gathered before Teletran 1.

"With the Decepticons being so quiet I have decided to have Teletran 1 split the ark evenly into two teams. One will represent the cons and the other remain bots to guard the ark." It was quiet for a few moments before Ratchet's loving voice snapped out like crackling lightning. _You could smell the burning ozone from his temper,_ mused Optimus.

"You forced me from medbay for this? What kind of crack pot idea is that Prime!?" Optimus glanced at his CMO and smirked behind his face mask.

"The _point_ is so that we can all find out what we need to work on while the cons are so quiet." Grumbling came from the medic as Optimus turned towards Teletran 1.

"Teletran, split the ark into two teams, one team is kept as bots the other as cons." All was quiet as Teletran did just that, random bots names zipping across the screen for a few moments. After a breem and a half the screen lit up with the designated 'cons' on one side and the other half with the designated bots.

"Switch Prowl and Jazz with Windcharger and Blaster." The four names switched so that Prowl and Jazz were 'cons', while Blaster and Windcharger were now bots.

"What was that for?" Questioned Wheeljack. Optimus turned grim optics on his CEO.

"The bots on this ship won't always have Jazz and Prowl around, unfortiantly with war anything can happen." Here he paused and looked over each and everyone of his officers. "I wish to see how they will fair without their TIC and SIC giving them orders."

The officers nodded and after a few more moments of discussion were dismissed. Heaving a weary sigh, Optimus turned away. Perhaps he would find a task for just the two of his officers. The tension between Jazz and Prowl had been going on for a few weeks now and was practically palpable.

They needed to have something give them a push, something to eradicate that tension and make them work better as not just the SIC and TIC but as a team. A bonded pair. And Optimus had just the idea.

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**AN:**

Okay so this was yet again another promt on Livejournal .com.

link: tf -bunny -farm .live journal 41 52 73. html just take out the spaces! It's a big enough promt to make a story of probably 3 chapters, but ya'll know me, I could drag it out to 20. lol

Let me know if I should continue it or not!

**~D.R. Out**


	3. Worst case Scenario II

Prowl stood silently, frame tense as he watched the 'cons' with Jazz. The other half of the ark, the ones that were still bots were running around and trying to up security. They were...rather amusing to watch, yet it was disheartening to see that they wouldn't survive very long without he or Jazz there. They were after all scrambling like glitch mice to ward off the 'con attack'.

Sighing, Prowl glanced at Jazz, his wings twitching to see his mate standing there moodily arms crossed. _He's still _angry...? Prowl mused softly on the topic of his mate, running scenarios. The probability that Jazz would cooperate with Prowl during this exercise was less than forty percent. Not very promising odds.

Optimus wanted the two of them to get inside the Ark, escape capture and to retrieve 'intelligence' from Teletran without being caught. This is going to be an interesting challenge. No matter how much Prowl loved a challenge he wasn't fully into it. Knowing that Jazz was still upset sent his spark whirling uncomfortably, keeping him from concentrating on statistics completely.

After a few more minutes of Jazz fuming and Prowl running scenarios the doorwinger finally came up with a plan that was mostly solid and gave a seventy-three percentile rate of working. He personally would have preferred a higher probability, but with so many factors against him it was nigh impossible. Especially without the aid of Jazz.

"Jazz?" The saboteur glanced at Prowl wearily behind his visor.

"Yeah?" The white and black saboteur turned to face his equally colored partner, armor glimmering in the low light of the desert's setting sun. Prowl's wings flicked slightly as grain infested wind swept over the sensitive appendages, the scratching it induced along the sensors was pleasant.

"I have a plan." Prowl murmured, forcing himself to snap out of his lax daze and to focus on the abnormally quiet mech called Jazz.

"Ya always have some plan...yet why can't you plan for a sparkling?" The tone held no small tint of spite, the visor flashing with accusation. All pleasantness vanished as Prowl huffed a sigh and walked down the hill, contemplating how to best get around the 'battle'. Between both Jazz and himself, and himself and the bots.

"Am talkin' to ya Prowl! Don't walk away from me!" The saboteur was at his side, anger flaring minutely through the closed bond. The tactician immediately became weary, an angry Jazz was a dangerous Jazz. While he knew that his mate would never intentionally harm him Prowl also knew that he was prone to acting on emotion more so than logic.

"Jazz we have a mission-" He attempted to speak in his best soothing voice, but the flaring sensation of anger from his other half already told him that the storm was done brewing and was heading his way.

"Frag you and your missions! Ya can be such a sparkless drone ya know that!" As soon as Jazz cut Prowl off and said those words he immediately regretted them. The look in his mates optics, the sudden flash of pain and begrudging acknowledgment sent a dull throb through his spark.

He reached out both through the bond and physically, but Prowl turned away. His wings risen in a high tight V, optics an cold icy blue. His battle processor quickly began ciphering the emotional turmoil he was subjected to before he had the chance to glitch, already the vents on his helm were opening up and puffing out steaming air.

"Prowl..." Prowl was struggling to focus, the turmoil was hitting his processors and hitting them hard. Battle computer and logic crystals became overly active and caused more heated air to puff from the vents along the datsun's helm.

"We have a seventy-three percent chance of success with the plan I have drawn. Already I have spotted the...bots weaknesses." Jazz winced behind his mate's back. When Prowl hid behind his statistics from Jazz it meant he was trying to escape some pain...or trying not to glitch, usually it was a combination of the two.

_ Frag...Ah'v really hur' 'im aven't ah..._Jazz stayed silent at that thought and listened to Prowl, the plan was a good one he must admit. All of his plans were good, but this one...it was...different. Refreshing. Overly thought out even, that made his vents hitch and spark clench. He was causing his mate utter grief as Prowl tried to escape Jazz's words by creating _this_.

The plan that Jazz was presented with was so strait forward he couldn't have created it better himself. He was to go to the vents in the Ark and climb in, go strait to Teletran 1 while incapacitating any 'guards'. Prowl would create a diversion at the entrance. Normally it would be the other way around, but the bots wouldn't be expecting it like this. To have the SIC creating the diversion instead of the TIC for once. It would put Prowl at a slight disadvantage seeing as he was more of a long ranged attacker, but his secret abilities would help balance that out some.

Jazz nodded and headed after Prowl, waiting until his mate gave a battle cry and attacked a bot with circuit-su. It was an ancient fighting form that Jazz had learned in his earlier years, but didn't use very often. It would be enough to distract the discombobulated bots whom hadn't been expecting Prowl to attack in servo-to-servo combat.

**Jazz POV**

I quickly took off stealthily, merely a shadow to the bots who were busy with the 'cons'. I smirked and climbed up the rocks and wiggled my way into a vent completely unnoticed. _Too easy..._The thought caused a frown to pull at my lips as I moved through the ventilation shafts.

Carefully opening a grate I peaked my helm out and glanced around, the sight of the terror twins confirmed my suspicions. It was 'too easy' because the guards were the dreaded front liners around Teletran. No need to put any around entrances within the Ark, the twins would take care of most anyone who tried to get near the designated protected point.

I studied the twins quietly, smirking I retreated into the shadows of the ventilation shaft and moved down a few hallways. Reaching into subspace I pulled out a small device and clicked a button. Throwing it out of the shaft it hit the ground and rolled a little ways with a clatter before exploding. Not a moment later Sideswipe came to investigate, grinning I dropped from the vents in pursuit to incapacitate him only to find a blaster pushed against the back of my helm. Sides was smirking at me as his twin held me captive. _well this is embarrassing...Ah gotta wonder tho'...is Prowl having any better luck?_

**Prowl POV**

Long after Jazz left I was still locked in a battle with Blaster. The communications officer was sufficient at keeping out of reach, but clumsy at retaliating. I growled low in my throat as Blaster once again managed to dodge a blow to the helm. I ducked a kick and thrust the flat of my palm up, finally hitting his chin up and causing him to stumble back. Darting forward I nimbly hit the back of his helm and knocked him offline.

**.:Prowler...uh:.**

** .:Did you get the Intel?:.**

** .:Funny thing about that-:.**

** .:You got captured didn't you?:.**

** .:...maybe...:.**

** .:I'll be there momentarily:.**

The whole conversation took no more than an astro second, and it was the first time in roughly two human weeks- but no more than a quartex- that the bond had been open. Darting through the masses of mechs, dodging strategically around them I quickly entered the ark. Reaching into subspace I pulled out my enforcer baton, it was charged with enough of a electromagnetic charge to down most mechs Inferno's size. I was sure it would be enough to handle the twins, Jazz didn't say it was them but I hadn't seen them around the 'battlefield' so I knew they were the most plausible guards.

Pausing I let a slow smirk grace my lip components as I reached out and let the electrified baton thump against the wall as I walked. Every time it struck the wall sparks lit up the dim hallways of the Ark with a loud CRACK. Glancing up at the lights I mentally hacked into the ark from where I stood and got the lights to shut down.

Stepping into the thresh hold of the room that held my mate captive I let a sinister smirk grace my lips. Baton glowing and writhing with electricity I smacked it against the wall. Two pair of optics and a visor swiveled my way seeing the sparks and my briefly lit up face plates. I rumbled in a low velvet voice I hadn't used in quite a while, it was the voice of a predator. I didn't normally let others see this side of me, not the killer. Never the killer. Only Jazz knew of this side.

"You thought you could capture my mate? Hold him hostage?" I slowly walked forward, baton sparking as it touched the wall.

"You are mistaken." The twins snarled and lunged at me. That was their first mistake. With deadly accuracy I swung the baton and slammed it against Sideswipes helm, immediately he was knocked unconscious from the charge.

Their second mistake was leaving Jazz unattended. Turning to Sunstreaker to see his own predatory optics glowing in the dark I knew it would be an interesting match, but I also wanted to end this and take Jazz away to thoroughly ravish him. If Jazz wanted sparklings so badly who was I to deny?

One moment the visor was by Teletran, the next it was behind Sunstreaker. Before the yellow mech had time to realize his mistake Jazz pinched the wire in the back of his helm, Sunstreaker was out like a light and crumpling to the floor.

Jazz and I nodded at each other and moved to Teletran to gain the information we needed. An alarm sounded and we quickly took an abandoned route to escape notice from Prime and the other officers. We won and the simulation was over, Prime could handle getting everyone back to shift and sending me the report.

Sometimes it took a couple a talking session to relief the tension in a relationship. For others they needed time away, for us? We needed something to make us see that without both there was only one, and when there was only one then both were vulnerable. It was our turn around. Is all we needed was a worst case scenario.

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**AN:**

Happy thanks-giving everyone! So I got part two, and it's the last part decidedly for this little prompt, out on thanksgiving! How awesome am I? haha. Let me know what ya'll think.

**~D.R. Out**


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